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Player Profile

Tan Jia Hao
Catholic High 2005-2008
Wushu Captain 2007-2008
Vice-head Prefect 2007-2008
Anderson Junior College 2009-2010
Someone who is good in nothing
tjh_stealth@hotmail.com

Player Likes

Liverpool FC
Felicia Chin
Jessica Alba
BY2
Chio Bu
Kung Fu Soccer
My godsiblings

Player Wants

Reina's gloves
Mahjong table
New Zinc/Crumpler bag
A not-lonely b/day
Mahjong set



Links

Harrison | Jimmy | John | Kah Koon | Yong Yuan | Richie | Sei Yee | Shawne | Edwin Heng | Wen Xuan | Xing Yu | Yi Bin | Miao Shan | Chi Shun | Edmund | Guan Yan | Hubert | Vernice | Yong Hwee | Zhao Jie | Zhao Jie 2 | Zi Ling | Yan Jun | Sheena | Jun Wei | Shi Yu | Terence | Dennis | Aloysius | Zheng Yee | Javince | Rayner | Wei Kit | Yong Liang | Min Ron | Kai Rong | Leonard | Xing Yu | Seng Yew | Ms Chow | Jason | Jennica | Ivan | Joyce | JoErh | LiYing | Beng Heng | Xin Ying | Sui Peng |


More sites

Blogger
Blogskins.com
Liverpool Official site
Felicia Chin's blog
Felicia Chin's facebook
Felicia Chin's blog 2
Felicia Chin's friendster



Video station

Photobucket


Anything to say?







Past

October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
March 2010
May 2010
June 2010
August 2010
September 2010
March 2011
September 2011




Friday, September 24, 2010

Hi blog. Long time no see. I dont know what am i going to say here. I just feel like saying whatever is within me - all the things that i've kept within myself for some time. Maybe its not something new, but its something that keeps coming back to me even though i keep chasing it away.

Is it so difficult to pass a freaking paper in AJ? For 2 years in AJ i've not passed a freaking paper. Retest not counted. Even if its retest that i passed, the results suck to the max. No words can describe. People like Kenneth Tan get back AAC, and YiXiu get AAB, then me? EED. Those papers are retarded, i know it, yet i cant manage to score. Maybe its really not a good thing to get promoted to J2? Or maybe i shouldn't even come to AJ in the first place?

I always tell myself that i must pass i must pass, but then when i am doing the paper, most of the time i cant do the question and that only implies one thing - i am not going to pass again. Last time, i always didnt study and didnt prepare for exams cos i still have the "Cat High last-min" mentality, but after the promos i already know that it is impossible to achieve last min success. I studied, i practised TYS and other JC papers. So what? In the practice papers itself i already got so many questions that stunned me. I asked, i did more and i thought i was prepared for this prelim. Not all subjects though, but Physics at least.

I really had the hope and confidence to pass. Its some kind of feeling that i dont have in my entire AJ life. It was so good to have that feeling especially when you come out and discuss with your friends without finding many wrong answers. Hope was high. But its because of this high hope that i fell heavier. I thought i had the chance to score for mcq when i came out. Not many wrong answers when i discussed with my classmates, but when i get back the results? 17/40. WTF. One of the lowest in class. My only hope for passing a paper is gone within milli seconds. TOTALLY GONE. Especially when i see other people can easily get 27 to 29, i cant help but to feel a sense of despair. I felt hopeless. I...

Thinking of how i could even get owned in mcq, i really think i am a failure. So whats with all the practises and tuitions and consultations? All get digested and come out as SHIT. LOADS OF SHIT. Then in paper 2? 21/72. Another piece of rubbish paper done by me. So what if Louis and Adil get lower marks than me? I dont feel happy at all. Winning them 1 or 2 marks? I'm still as lousy right?

Whats the point of studying so much? Who can help me? Bell ring = my whole class go home. YY leh? Of course is with Sheena de wad. Jacq? She doesnt take physics and maths. Who else? Edwin? He's good and he's friendly and he's willing to help me, but he's always so busy. Teachers? I dont know its coincidence or what, whenever i have a consultation slot with my teachers, its either they last min cant make it or they gotta go after a short while. I'm on my own again.

Sometimes, i just couldnt hide my sorrows. I always tried to just my joker side to cover away my sadness, but there are times when i really cant do it. I cant hide anymore. What am i going to do? Someone please guide me? At times i really feel the ache within me. Heartache or whatever, i dont know how to describe. What can i do? Study or not study i still fail. A levels coming soon and i cant even pass anyth. I'm just leading a screwed up life! When can i really get focused and study well and pass a fucking paper? I'm stressed, and i feel that i am no longer the happy JH i used to be already. I want this whole thing to be over soon, but i know i am not prepared for this major exam. Maybe i wont make it? Maybe i will? I dont know. I really dont know. I dont know how i can help myself to achieve better results.

SOMEONE HELP ME PLEASE.


You'll Never Walk Alone
The Best Goalkeeper will walk with you* 8:10 AM

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